Self reliance

I have been working on my stuff for a while now, of course nothing will replace good old "employment", but this shit is most of the time not fulfilling, meetings leading nowhere, short-circuiting actual progress, waiting for feedback that are more confusing than really helping, often contradictory with other "directions", which make companies quite over-rated in a way, too many cooks and stupid authorities killing the creative process.. I named it the "confused team" syndrome, a friend call it "death by committee", you get the idea...

So anyway, my projects are getting together-ish, I'm not claiming to be building the next GTA or Elder scroll, but I find that it evolved quite in the right direction, not being restricted by a whole team, usually bringing not much..

I realised as well, that after so many years, playing with the different tools, and technologies, I finally can do most things, not perfectly obviously, but well enough to be independent, like most of us in the indie eco-system.. and what I never really did, makes sense to actually learn more about today!

State of play

Written on 2016, july 20th, published as is on 2017, feb 23rd

I find it to be a weird time to job hunt in australia.. it's a mixed bag of everything, aussies being turned away from jobs, because they're being told to be lazy (http://www.smh.com.au/comment/lazy-aussies-just-dont-want-to-work-20140529-zrrs6.html) or just because they dont fit the job for some random reasons (http://www.news-mail.com.au/news/you-cant-work-here-youre-aussie/2437548/)..

But on the other side, the current "open-for-business" government is failing to keep it this way, and advertise 457-visa jobs overseas bringing more workers.. Is it supposed to be fuelling the economy by having more "hard-working-demanding-nothing-but-still-paying-taxes" -slaves- migrants?

Who ever can give any insights on the whole thing, please let me know..

Is the information-flooded society killing us?

Nowadays, you're expected to be so many things at the same time, it's confusing, tiring, and probably lead to schizophrenia (that's my new self-diagnosed excuse to why stuff have not been working out lately, but yet again, maybe I'm just surrounded by dickheads and taking things to seriously importantly)

On your new resume you need to prove that you can:
do everything and dont cost a damn penny,
be serious and funny,
be humble but confident,
have tact but be honest,
be accepting when no one is,
be chill but super-efficient,
be yourself, but do as you're told, you get the pattern...
It's just a nightmare for those who take the feedback they're being given. So you overthink everything, feel overwhelmed and feel like nothing you do is right, or normal..


Are we building a future where we'll be "healthy" physically (yeah swallow that protein shake) but totally destroyed mentally?
Are we annihilating our development by trying to be everything at the same time, and finally not being anything at all..

As an example, this post is written in a silly way, made to be funny, but it's demonstrating the self-hatred one can have as she comments about the "love thyself" kinda quotes: https://annaleawest.com/2016/04/13/love-thyself/. She tries to get people to relativise about they're own negative inside speech, but doesn't bring any clear-correct-final answers..

It's either you love yourself, force to stop those negative thoughts about your doings, and just become a careless arrogant self-imbued dick, or make a point to learn and change, adapt every day and feel forever like a piece a shit, blaming yourself about everything that you judge doing wrong (even if it's probably not your fault).

And that leads us to wonder:

Is that part of the lessons of life? Accepting that "there is no final answer"? And if there's no answer, is there no question? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gertrude_Stein


I believe it's in the intention, you cant be what you want to be if you keep wanting to be something else, or someone else.. Stop trying to please everyone, that'll never work out..

Love Thyself

Written on 2016, july 11th, published as is on 2017, feb 23rd

Interesting memes/quotes based comments on the self-absorbed beings that we are.. but no clear-correct-final answers..

It's either you love yourself, force to stop those negative thoughts about yourself, and just become a careless arrogant self-imbued dick, or think you need to learn and change, adapt every day and feel forever like a piece a shit, blaming yourself about everything that you judge doing wrong (even if it's probably not).

And that leads us to wonder:
Is that part of the lessons of life? Accepting that "there is no final answer"?